Thursday, April 13, 2006
Put On The Spot

This is this programme that I like a lot on Starhub Channel 56 right now. It's called 国光帮帮忙. Hosted by three male hosts (namely 孙鹏, 屈中恒 and 庹宗康), it's a talkshow where celebrity guests are quizzed on a variety of topics, hosted in a light, breezy manner.

While I do not follow this show religiously, the times when I've watched it, I was thoroughly entertained. Unlike some Taiwanese programmes, the banter here is relatively civil and clean, but still quite funny.

Anyway, last night, for the second half of the show (I think they usually show two episodes at a go, so maybe that's why there are two different guests for each half of the televised programme shown on TV), the guest was a renowned Taiwanese writer by the name of 吴淡如. I am not going to talk about everything that they talked about (topics included scuba diving, one-night-stands, and the three 好s in a man that all women should keep away from...气质不好，情绪不好，喂口太好!).

Instead, I'd zoom in on a classic question that many girls like to put their guys on the spot with, the various answers guys come up with and what these answers mean to girls (according to that writer lah).

The question?

If both your mum and I (the girl) fall into a river (or whatever body of water she fancies) and you can only save one, who would you save?

Answers:

1) My mum (there is but only one mum after all...)

• The girl might think that you obviously don't care about offending her and is neglecting her feelings (even though it's the truth).

2) You

• The girl might think that you have a very sweet tongue and probably always give such an answer to every girl you meet as usually, very few guys would say such a thing. So you obviously must be a liar...or orphan? (So this answer can use if you are an orphan lah...)

3) I'd jump in and kill myself

• The girl would think you are an escapist and is to be avoided at all costs!

So guys, as you can see, if we give the above three standard answers, we lose no matter what we say. There is a fourth and fifth I would advise are better answers.

4) I'd save my mum (fulfill filial piety) then jump in and drown myself because I cannot live without you

• Hey, it's absolute BS but the girl would be like "awww shucks...you shouldn't"...

5) My lovely darling, what's on that beautiful mind of yours? Please do tell me...

• Sidesteps telling the truth and answering the question and of course, addressing the root of her questioning straight away. Girls don't just bring up such a question for fun, usually it's because they need some affirmation of love (?) so go straight to that loh. Why bother killing yourself with bad answers anyway?

The last answer can really be used anytime. So next time, your girl gets all hissy or melancholic and asks you these weird questions, just sidestep the question and get straight to the root...