Saturday, October 30, 2004
Handphone Madness

I haven't blogged for the past few days because conditions in the office have not been conducive for blogging so I didn't really have the mood to write.But more precisely,there haven't been any topics which I'd like to write about because there wasn't anything interesting to talk about at all.No topics that interested or gripped me so I had no content.I wouldn't want to write just for the sake of writing.But at least I got quite a bit of stuff to start blogging on now.

Anyway,in the office these past few days,there has been a lot of people getting giddy with joy and goggle-eyed over their new acquisitions,that is,new handphones as they capitalise on a Singtel roadshow that's come to our canteen and were offering subscriptions at corporate rates with discounted handsets.Since most of us had gotten our subscriptions at around the same time almost two years ago,all of us again re-contracted on the same day,with us getting new handsets to boot.For me,as my current handset is still rather new,I just got a new handset for the sake of it but more on that later as my new handset has found a new owner.As for the rest of the X-Men,seeing the explosion of excitement and concentration in the eyes of some of them here,if not most,it seems like most of them were transported to an era when they were still young and were just aquainted with a new toy that they had never seen before.It's quite amazing actually.Now,before I go on,I got to divert to some other topics.

First off,last evening between 5:30 and 7:30,there was supposed to be some kind of corporate function going on at Eunos to celebrate Ramadan and for non-Muslim colleagues to better understand the customs of our fellow Muslims.Now,this is a perfectly good idea,save for three points.

First point,I think a broadcast email would have done the trick prefectly,without the need to have to fix an event to specially celebrate it.We can be just as well informed if we had read an email describing the customs of such a tradition.And the event was fixed after work so that non-Muslims can "break fast" together with the Muslims.Now,don't you think the Muslim members would prefer to break fast in the private sanctuary of their own homes,together with their loved ones after a long day at work,rather than be gawked on by a bunch of hungry non-Muslims with commentry going on about what they might be doing(This is an X-Men speculation:Since it was supposed to be an exercise in understanding the customs,while the Muslims were performing their rituals or customs,there has to be someone there to explain what they are doing...be it prayers or whatever,don't you think that's rude?You are praying and someone is there droning on about why you are doing it).It's stupid and I think,insensitive in a way.I think the Muslims would want to be home after a tiring day,instead they are dragged to a corporate event...so that their pratices can be observed by a group of onlookers?Not very nice right?

Second point:Ain't the government supposed to be on some kind of economic drive to save money by cutting out unnecessary frills?So why are we blowing money on corporate events like this?The venue wasn't even held in office premises which would mean rental costs are incurred.And the food costs money too of course.I think we have to be accountable to taxpayers about how we spend the money right?

Thirdly,it's the brainchild of our God.I might be biased here but I do have to question what's his objective?To really foster understanding or to add shine to his portfolio that he's a "good and undersatnding" boss.Our God has the reputation of being a ambitious,silky-tongued go-getter who'd make use of anything and anybody to get what he wants to further his career and he is as fake as can be.Which is why he's made a hell of a lot of enemies in the upper management circles because he'd tread on their toes anytime if necessary to get noticed.I won't go on about his misdeeds anymore but the point is,if he was understanding,he'd realise that people want to be home after work,not spend even more time with him.

Anyway,out of this thing borned an interesting episode.As the event starts at 5:30,people who attended the event needed to leave the office at about 4:45 in order to reach the venue on time.For those who're not going,that meant that there was no 政府 in the office anymore.Wow,do you get the equation?It means that if you are unscrupulous enough,you can leave early without anyone knowing as most of the bigwigs would have left for the event.Some interesting stuff occurred here,for our division,ALL the X-Men stayed behind except maybe for Dazzler who might have went.Colossus,Jubilee,Wolverine,Rogue and me did not go,neitehr did Prof X,Psylocke,Iceman and Archangel.Oh,Nightcrawler went but she's not an X-Men per se.All the Brotherhood members went:Toad,Avalanche,Destiny,Mastermind,Juggernaut,Mr Sinister and Sabretooth.Apparently,Mr Sinister,now the leader of the pack after the departed Magneto has offered to lead them on a tour of Geylang Serai and that theyw ould meet up with Magneto there too.I heard from Prof X that this group's bond is very strong but this is well,eye opening.They see each other for 5 days a week,8 hours a day(that is 40 hours at least because apparently they do go back to work together as a group on Saturdays and Sundays...do they have a life outside of this group?) and they can't get enough of each other?

There was another interesting episode Prof X told me when some innocent assistant had briefed Mastermind on some work and told him not to follow Magneto's processes because it was crap(but it's true,magneto was horrible at her work...and I think horrible might have been nice to describe her level of competence)and Mastermind and Destiny both shot him with the evil eye.Prof X had to step in to temper things.

Aside from this,there has been something interesting going on between Destiny and Avalanche.Destiny,being the only girl in the group and being reasonably pretty,must get plenty of attention from all the guys even though she has a bf.Avalanche,particularly seems close to her.Apparently,he would wait for her to knock off and stuff like that and is always close to her.I've asked Prof X and Dazzler about this but they said there should be nothing between them because the girl treats all the guys the same way but the guy...well well well,that's another matter isn't it?It's fair play to him because Destiny only has a bf...she's NOT married,you know.So get ready for Office Romance part deux?Watch this space.

Anyway,that's not the interesting episode,the interesting thing was that the unscrupulous one who made use of the fact that the management wasn't around to leave early was none other than our head herself,Rogue.She left at 5.The rest of us adhered and left only on time at 5:30.Prof X apparently caught her in the act when she left the office with her handbag.He asked her if she was 'supporting the Ramadan thingy".Rogue replied that"no,she wasn't going there but was going elsewhere instead".Elsewhere?Like where?Such as home perhaps?Wow.I can just imagine her panicky face and voice when Prof X probed her with that question."Shit,I am being found out...let's just answer with a non-specific answer."Clever but dumb at the same thing.

Oh,a former X-Men,I call him Cannonball,has returned to the fold today and will start work at another department after having left this place earlier.I think he's being his usual self again when he came to our level to look us up and talk to us but seriously,while all of us are happy for him to have come back here,there isn't really a great deal of excitement about his reappointment.Not as much as the guy himself anyway.It's probably not a big deal to us but Cannonball looks and behaves as if he hasn't seen us in ages...and erm he hasn't actually.Well,good luck to him and his new job.He'd enjoy it.It seems pretty strange then that some of us are rather desperate to get out of this place while he's the only one excited to be back.

Now back to handphone business.As i said before,most of us,if not all got brand new handsets.Colossus got himself a shiny,expensive Sony Ericcsson K700i,Jubilee got herself a free Samsung X-100a,Storm and Jean Grey got themselves the LG C1100 clamshell while JG and Shadowcat also got the Nokia 6100 for their mums.I got myself a free Motorola C380 as a backup set.Pardon me for all the names of these phone models,if you are not a handphone person,you probably have no idea what these are.

The phones seem to make almost everyone childlike as you look at them staring goggle-eyed with wonder at their shiny new gadgets.Jubilee,particularly,was extremely enamoured with her new handset...so enamoured,she was caressing it like...gasp...GOLLUM.My preeeecious...well,at least the handset doesn't destroy the bearer like the ring does so she's safe.But to be fair,I think Jean Grey and Storm also started looking like Frodo like Mount Doom when he was about to toss the ring back into the molten lava.They looked like kids with marbles.Hmmm,what do kids with marbles look like?But anyway,the things a handset can do to people...such evil...

Well,Colossus must be the most pleased of the lot.His shiny new hi-tech K700i has now put my metrosexual (and some say sissy)Samsung E700(yes,you can shoot 12 pictures in machine-gun rapid succession,imagine the usefulness...snap snap snap snap snap...hmmm,how come all the pictures look the same???) to the shade.How dare he usurp my throne as the standard-bearer of handphone supremacy in the office?!That's heresy.Anyway,talking about sissy phones,Iceman's LG G7100 is even more sissy(or is that Beckham-esque metrosexual)than mine,it has a large "mirror" on the outside for him to powder his face when he needs to.

For me,the new Motorola handset I got had landed into the hands of my pop.I think he started eyeing it the moment I brought it home...oooooh,my preeecious,his thoughts must have rang out.It was less than six months ago when I had bought him a brand-new Nokia 3100 handset and now he wants a new phone.Wow,I think all Singaporeans must be handphone fad crazy in one way or another.Think about it,who around you has no handphone?And which among them don't crave a new phone if he or she could get their hands on one?But I don't think it's a unique Singaporean trait.All people fancy new things...handphones or otherwise.

And as for the discarded Nokia 3100,I had half a mind to just use it as my backup unit when I go overseas or for reservist but that's not what I'm going to do.Instead I'd apply for a pre-paid card for my mum so that she can carry her first ever handphone.Even if it's a discard from my dad but hey come on,it's barely six months old so it's not that bad.Why did I decide to apply a line for my mum?Well,read on...

Last evening as I was changing the SIM card for my dad and configuring all the settings for him in his new Motorola set,I saw my mum eyeing the Nokia set(she didn't say anything of course).So I told her point-blank that I'd apply a line for her so that the phone isn't wasted lying idle around.My dad latched onto my suggestion and jumped onto the bandwagon,repeadtedly voicing that I should do that for her.A subtle reaction came from my mum.She started asking how to switch on the phone and what to press top answer or end calls...before suddenly retreading and saying that"no lah,I don't need a phone.For what,a phonecard works fine what!"Wow,that's a quick turnaround.

Sons and daughters,please note that parents have a way of doing and saying things that you have to observe.When they start expressing a subtle interest in something before abruptly performing a u-turn and saying that they don't need such and such...please read between the lines:Don't need DOESN'T MEAN don't want.If they didn't want,they won't express that interest in the first place.If you are a filial child,buy the thing for him or her.They will go "Aiyaaa,why you go and buy?I told you don't buy what..."but I'd tell you,they're are as pleased and happy as bunnies in their hearts even though they may look or talk otherwise.All parents are pleased when their children buy or do something for them,they just don't outwardly express it.When their children buy something for them,even though they're pleased,they seem to find it a need to put on the parental hat and lecture us on "financial prudence" and why we shouldn't waste money on "this kind of stuff".It's a parental thing,like they don't want their children to buy stuff for them,not stuff like these anyway.I don't understand the psyche of course but I don't need to.I just need to know how it works.

Right.It's quite a long blog that I've written here so to be totally honest so I'm just so glad to end it at this point because my hands and finger joints are aching.My long-windedness is certainly getting to me again.I hope it's not getting to you guys/gals too.Anyway,enjoy your weekend,gals and dudes!

Cyclops...out!

Argh...hand me a barf bag.