Tuesday, March 15, 2005
Complain Complain Complain

Aiyo,tor long ah,Singaporeans can stop complaining or not?Some of these people ah,really complain about the weirdest things.Witness first a complaint letter in the ST Forum today.Written by a certain Mr Lim Ah Kheng (if you're a Miss then I'm mistaken and terribly sorry but you should change your name lah...),he complained about the IT Show in Suntec.Eeee,so many people and so much goods being moved around,fire hazard leh,he complained.

Wah lau eh,uncle ah.You want the hall to be empty,is it?Then the vendors hold an IT Show for f#$%?You think what?IT Show for ghosts and spirits ah?So must hold it during lunar seventh month,is it?You tell me who want to hold exhibition if restrict number of poeple?And goods being moved around,you also complain.Then what you expect the vendors to do?Pay on the spot then go to their warehouse in Tuas to collect ah?Who want to buy anything then?I tell you,if that was the case,the show will be lukcy to generate $100 total sales for its entire duration.

You go to a show,you expect it to be crowded what.I don't know what kind of a 山龟 Mr Lim is but he must be detached from reality.Does he know how many exhibitions we have to cancel a year if we went by his criteria?And what about places that are crowded during various times and occasions,do we restrict people's movement too?So lunchtime at foodcourt...clear them out!Fire hazard!Somemore kitchen confirm got fire.Jerry Yen autograph signing at Heeren...clear them out!Fire hazard!So many screaming,senseless girls confirm someone will do something stupid and burn the place down one what...but don't ask me how lah...Mr Lim will tell you how.

And then I got to mention Dr Balaji Sadasivan and his gays = AIDS epidemic talk.Relak lah,brother.311 cases and you make it sound whole of Singapore dying of AIDS.I didn't know Singapore got only population of 400,I thought it was something like 4 million (?).Aiya,but then Singapore so small,311 people die is damn jia lat already lah.So it's all those bloody 基佬's fault!KILL THEM ALL.BURN THEM ALL.SEE YOU IN HELL...

Ok ok,relak a bit.I saw the stats on HIV cases in Singapore and although cases of infected gays has increased quite a bit,majority...and I mean majority are still straight people.Guys who go after gals.Get it?Don't blame it all on the poor gays lah.Dr Balaji makes it sound like the gays solely responsible for the 28% rise.It's not like that so don't pinpoint them like that lah.So paiseh.They already so ostracised in this tiny country and you make it worse by saying they're killing us all.Hey,wait a second...I detect a conspiracy...they say they afraid foreign gays infect local gays.Those foreign gays include Malaysians.So in effect,the Malaysians are trying to kill us all!Badawi is plotting to reclaim Singapore!Kill the Malaysians back,tit for tat.Poison the water we sell back to them.Don't say my theory is not based on substantial evidence,ok...it's got as much substance as Mr Balaji's theory.Make of that what you will.

And then then (I got to use 2 thens since I used "And then..." to introduce the last topic) there is the issue of the Singapore Guvment syaing that Guvment not supposed to lead the drive to buy local...they talk can already,everybody else do.Guvment tender different mah...must curry flavour foreign MNCs so that they continue FDI here.Why buy stupid Ranger desktop when you can buy Dell?Michael Dell employ people here leh...wait,or is that in India?But anyway,local construction companies lousy one lah,must employ Japanese or Ang Moh then better.Ang Moh contractor may have built The Esplanade (one of the seven wonders of the world...you wonder why people actually pay to build it.) and its durian structure isn't really that nice but if you hand it to a local contractor,you know what you will get?Two rambutans...you know,a lot of fibreglass antennas sticking out.Nothing bad what you say...but wait till you juxtapose that against the Westin Stamford Hotel...now you not only get a giant woody,you also get two hairy b#$%s.At least the Ang Mo version not hairy.

Aiya,seriously,who want to buy local?My mum buy oyster sauce also call me buy Lee Kum Kee,no Sin Sin or NTUC brand for us.It's a bit too 水 already.Who buys Akira anyway?We want Panasonic,Sony,Toshiba.Akira sounds like a cartoon...oh,it is one?And Creative MuVo or Zen Micro...f#$% lah.Just buy Apple Shuffle or iPod Mini.No control nevermind,the adverts look good what.Like Apple say:Life is random anyway what,you know...like when you choose schools or courses,you eenie manie moh one also what,correct?Where got people make informed choices one?

Life is random...f#$% control.Don't control my CPF money,give it to me now!