Monday, March 14, 2005
Mind Your Language

It's good that I don't set New Year resolutions like "I will not write blogs during office hours" because 1)I don't know how long I'd be able to keep the oath going and 2)I really don't know how long I'd be able to keep the oath going.Hmmm,funny,1 and 2 looks almost alike.I'd leave a short post here because I really don't feel like working at the moment.And blogging kills time which I have plenty of.

I'd be going in-camp on Thursday for my annual ICT.That's In-Camp Training for all the uniniated out there.It's funny.When we're in the army,we can't wait to get out of it.But when we're 臭 reservist 老兵,it really doesn't seem all that bad.The first few ICT days are usually spent basically lying in bed and waiting for meals or things to do...or we are doing things quickly so that we can quickly go back to our bunks to lie in bed.Then when the action starts,we are usually lying prone on the ground to set up perimeters or we're eating hot food in our rovers.So you see,in camp,we are either lying horizontal and growing horizontal.It's not that bad at all.

One of my good army friends,General Custer,just messaged me to ask me when I am going in.He's going in on Wednesday,one day before me...so he's lamenting how come I always get the luck.What luck???HELLO???!!!I had to remind that CHOW KENG KING that for the last five in-camps,he lasted only 3 days per in-camp before the number 4 camouflage uniforms started giving him the rashes and he bailed out via MC on all 5 occasions.Now who has the luck???I always have one question for him...how come he managed to serve 2 1/2 years during NS in camouflages WITHOUT getting any rashes and then after he ORDs,he gets rashes everytime he puts the ugly green thing on.What does he store his uniforms in?A suitcase of sulphur?Well,protects his uniforms from any snakes that may slither into them.And I am quite sure he probably eats any snakes which he killed...that 吃蛇王.

I had a bad weekend but I'm not going to talk about it.Life is a matter of ups and downs...of peaks and troughs...you ride through the lows and enjoy the highs.I'm riding right now...or trying.Anyway,a more serious subject matter is at hand.The subject matter of proper parliamentary langauge.

Last Friday,our nation-building paper,ST,reported on NMP Ong Soh Khim's unparliamentary language she used during,where else,a Parliament session.She apparently uttered "SHIT" and "RUBBISH" during a parliamentary debate on MOE's Budget.

Actually,what's so wrong with those two words eh?It's not as if she shouted out SHIT!!!! while the debate was going on.Some very educated and refined MPs apparently couldn't stand the sound of such a dirty word and complained to the House Speaker about it.Wah lau eh (Is that also considered unparliamentary if I uttered them in Parliament?),I mean let's not be so anal retentive lah.The entertaining Taiwanese government MPs throw punches and pizzas at each other while we censure someone for whispering shit?No wonder our entertainment scene is so backward.And come on,what if her whole sentence was really..."When is this debate going to end?I need to go and shit."Then isn't she very 冤枉?But then again I guess,by government standards,she still shouldn't be using the word shit...so unrefined...she should have said 我需要去方便.

And if she really wanted to utter those expletives in retaliation to what she feels is wrong about the Budget,she should still have used more refined words...for instance,in place of shit,say 米田共 or what's really known as 屎 to us and in place of rubbish,say 垃圾...pronounced Le She in true-blue Taiwanese style.Remember 华语Cool!We got to 享应政府号召 to brush up on our Mandarin.And speaking expletives in Mandarin also makes you way cooler.

Ok ok,maybe I don't know the whole story and context lah so I'm really defending her for fun.But hey,come on,compared to Ling How Doong's "You don't talk cock lah you" comment,she's small fry.Mr Ling apparently also uttered "bastard" and "arsehole" during his time in power.Woah,Mr Ling,salute man...but no real respect.Because if you got REAL balls,you'd be aiming those words at PM,DPM or any of the ministers...not at poor old Chiam See Tong.

And anyway,Ling's words do have an element of truth in them...we hear so much cock during the parliamentary sessions on the subject of the casino,that I take these debates on the issue as more of a play than a serious debate.